How to increase your baseline happiness
This topic deserves WAY more attention than it’s going to get in this newsie, but I figured I would start planting some seeds.
I tend to forget how complicated this issue is and things that may seem obvious to me at this point aren’t even on others’ radars. This is the start of a conversation I'll keep having with y'all.
How many times have you heard someone say, “when I get promoted, I’ll be happy”, “if I can just find my partner, I’ll be happy”, “once I quit my soul sucking job, I’ll be happy”, or “once I buy that house/clothing/car, I’ll be happy”?
Fill in the first part with pretty much any external factor and I can guarantee that you won’t find true happiness once you attain it. Sure, I get that each of these things could increase your happiness temporarily, but you should consider two factors when making a statement like that:
You are on the hedonic treadmill. A theory that people return to their baseline happiness regardless of what happens to them (note: the examples given in that link are essentially the same ones I gave -- these are the common tricky ones!). Perfect example: look at the pants you're wearing or the car you drive and think back to the day you bought it, do you still feel that same level of happiness?
Stop and think, what if you decided to be happy NOW? Shawn Achor (one of my favorite authors in the positive psychology realm) argues if you find happiness first, the successes will follow. Flip that script, baby! Please listen to that TEDtalk and if you are a leader in your org, I would argue everyone on your team should listen, too.
Recognizing you’re about to hop on that hedonic treadmill is one thing, but then it’s VERY easy to convince yourself this time it is different.
I have a few external dreams that consistently creep up in my brain. Every now and then, I find myself making some version of the “if I meet my partner, I’ll be happy” story. I’ve also gotten very good at coming up with excuses as to why this story is NOT me jumping on the hedonic treadmill. We’re all human.
Ok great, so now you’re wondering how the hell you can suddenly become happy to avoid these pitfalls. While these external factors cannot permanently alter your happiness, there are proven tools that will! YAY.
Journal/think of/say outloud 3 things you’re grateful for each day (reminder: it takes 21 days to create a habit. So, commit to this for 21 days.). This takes 2 minutes/day and it was the most life changing tool I adopted 7 years ago. The reason it’s so powerful is because it trains your brain to scan your world for positives.
Journal one positive experience/day. This also only takes 2 minutes and can be an amazing practice to adopt with your partner, friends, family, coworkers, etc. Recently I helped my brother and sister-in-law put my niece to bed and heard them ask her, “what was the best part of your day?”, to which we all went around and explained our favorite parts of our days. Imagine if the entire world did this every night before bed.
Exercise. This doesn’t have to be hours on the trails -- only 15 mins of cardio does the trick. BONUS: get outside and get moving (hmm, I'm sensing a theme here of my two challenge groups this month).
Breathe. Another 2 min tool. Push your chair away from your desk and focus on breathing in and out for 2 mins….Day. Changed.
Express your gratitudes and kindness. One text/email/nice comment that praises or acknowledges someone you know (different person every day) will rewire the day. Each morning, after I journal, I fire off at least one of these treats to someone in my life. I actually think this is the QUICKEST way to increase your happiness. Don’t believe me? Next time you’re grocery shopping, give a compliment to the cashier. I promise you’ll walk out feeling great.
I actually consider each of these to be pretty easy to adopt, but I know it’s hard to change habits! Let me know which one(s) you’re most interested in adopting into your life and if you’d be interested in some sort of accountability group around it!
Still not convinced this is all worth it? Check out these stats from years of research on the outcomes of a happier brain:
Productivity rose by 31 percent
Sales increased by 37 percent
The likelihood of promotion rose by 40 percent
In medicine, doctors were 19 percent faster, and more accurate at coming up with the correct diagnosis when positive.
Imagine if all leaders focused on increasing positivity as a key metric. I don’t just mean “leaders” in the setting of an organization. We are all leaders in our own lives.
Replace the typically associated meaning of “promotion” with the idea of you promoting up to a newly achieved level in something you’re focusing on, i.e. I am 40% more likely to promote myself from running marathons to completing a triathlon when my brain is happy. Or how about: I am 40% more likely to get that new shiny title of being someone’s partner when my brain is happy. Pretty compelling.
This weekend, try paying attention to any time you say/think “once I have X, I’ll be happy”. Don’t worry about making any changes yet, just recognize those thoughts and take note.
The 5 tactics I shared of how to increase happiness are extremely near and dear to my heart and I’d love to host a challenge for the month of November (gratitude month??) supporting y’all in the one that would be the most impactful for you. Reply and let me know your thoughts!
💕,
CC
